A Coven of Prefects
by canoncansodoff
Summary: Hermione and the other new fifth-year female prefects discover that their most important duties aren't described in their Prefect's Handbook. This Hr/Padma version is ON HIATUS. See "A Coven of Prefects - Harmony Version" for H/Hr in-progress updates.
1. Chapter 1

**The Coven of Prefects**

**A/N:** This is a Hermione-centered fic that starts out Hr/Padma, and expands from there. There will be multiple pairings, and Harry will be the kind of wizard that a witch's witch would be willing to make exceptions for.

This story is cross posted on patronuscharm(dot) net, where there may be a lemon-friendly NC-17 version. A H/Hr harmonious version will also be created and posted on portkey(dot)org.

**Disclaimer:** Not my characters, no money being made, etc., etc.

**oo00OO00oo**

Freshly-minted fifth-year prefect Hermione Granger frowned when her Slytherin counterpart entered the unused classroom.

"What are you doing here, Parkinson?"

"I was invited," the pug-nosed witch replied. "Presumably just like you."

The truth behind Pansy's statement was supported when Hannah Abbott and Padma Patil entered the room.

"Oh…must be a meeting of new female prefects," said Padma, as she passed Pansy and took a seat next to Hermione.

"And you need to be a Ravenclaw to figure that out?" snarked Pansy.

"No," Padma replied evenly. "But you might need to be a Ravenclaw in order to figure out why it wasn't the Headmaster that called this meeting, or why the male prefects aren't involved."

"Either a Ravenclaw or Hermione," said Hannah, with a nod towards the Gryffindor.

"You'll all find out soon enough, if you take a seat," said a voice from the doorway.

The young witches complied as Septima Vector entered the classroom and cast both locking charms on the door and silencing spells on the walls, floor and ceiling. Once the room's security had been adequately addressed, the Arithmancy professor turned to the four younger witches and smiled.

"Let me begin by congratulating you on your selection as Fifth-Year Prefects," she began. "I am certain that over the next three years you will _all _serve both your school and your sister witches with distinction."

"Sister witches, Professor?" asked Hannah. "I've read through the Prefect's Handbook twice, but don't recall seeing any gender-specific responsibilities listed there."

"Nothing in _Hogwarts, a History_, either," added Hermione.

Vector smiled. "That is because both books were written and edited by wizards," she explained. "Your responsibilities to the female population at Hogwarts are codified by unwritten rules that have been secretly passed down through the years, from one witch to another."

At the sight of four confused faces, the Arithmancy professor asked, "Perhaps some background is in order?" When the four fifth-years all nodded, the elder witch began her story.

"You have, no doubt, heard stories about Hogwarts' broom closets being used for activities unrelated to cleaning supplies? Perhaps one or more of you have even had personal experience with this kind of activity?"

The four new prefects cast furtive looks at each other, and considered if any or all of them were in the latter camp.

"Having all read the Prefect's Handbook," Vector continued, "you know the rules, and your obligations as prefects should you discover couples snogging or more during your nighttime patrols."

"Yes, Professor," the witches all replied.

"Well, I'm hear to reveal a sad reality," said Vector. "These rules are unevenly applied, and within our patriarchal system it's the witches who always come out on the short end of the broomstick."

"How so, Professor?" Hermione asked.

"In any number of ways," Vector replied with a sigh. "With the two most important involving love potions and lesbians."

"What?" asked the four female prefects (using slightly different words that were nonetheless voiced at the same time and with the same incredulity.)

"Love potions and lesbians," repeated the professor.

"Lesbians using love potions?" asked Padma.

"No, no…separate issues," Vector replied. "Take love potions first….you four have heard of them, I suppose?"

"Amortentia?" asked Hermione.

"That, along with nastier potions that involve compulsion, memory loss, or lowered inhibitions," the elder witch stated. "Over the years, hundreds of male students have likely either used them on unknowing witches, or tried to escape sanctions by claiming that they were the victim of a love potion once they were caught in the act."

The fifth-years sat silently and considered the disturbing possibilities.

"I could see how wizards could use magic to lure their victims into broom closets," Hermione stated. "But how would they use them to escape blame once they're discovered?"

"They'd dose themselves after the fact," Pansy Parkinson said quietly. "Probably carry a vial of love potion with them, and down it after they'd been caught with their robes down around their ankles."

"So that they could claim that it was the witch who had enticed him into the broom closet by giving him the potion?" asked Hannah.

"Sneaky bastards," hissed Padma. "So what happens when the witch claims their innocence?"

"The wizards take care of their own," Vector said bitterly. "Even when the boy gets caught trying to take the potion after the fact, their crimes are waved off with the attitude that 'wizards will be wizards'."

"What about the lesbians?" Hannah quietly asked (leading the others to wonder if there was more than idle curiosity behind it).

Vector snorted. "What lesbians?" she asked. "Don't you know that lesbians don't exist within the wizarding world?"

"That would seem to be a statistical impossibility," said Hermione.

"Oh it is, it is," the Arithmancy professor replied ruefully. "But that doesn't keep the Ministry or our beloved Headmaster from trying to make it so."

"What do you mean?" asked Hermione. "Is there some magical 'cure' for homosexuality?"

"No," replied the elder witch. "But there are wizards in positions of power who can cast powerful memory charms, and aren't afraid of using them in the name of the so-called common good."

"What common good could be served by brainwashing?" Hermione asked.

"Keeping an adequate supply of breeding stock on hand," offered Pansy. "Use your brain, Granger…what good is a pure-blood witch if she isn't willing to spread her legs for a pure-blood wizard and produce pure-blood magical heirs?"

"Is this true, professor?" Hermione asked warily.

"I'm afraid so, Miss Granger," the Professor replied.

"So there are laws proscribing lesbian acts?"

"No," Vector replied. "Female homosexuality is treated as a serious mental ailment, rather than a crime…something to be needs to be cured."

"Cured with memory charms?" Hermione asked incredulously. "How can you cure someone that is inherently born a lesbian by altering her memory?"

"You can't, at least not completely," Vector admitted. "But that doesn't stop them from trying."

"So," Padma asked somewhat nervously. "What would happen if, say, Hermione and I were caught snogging in a broom closet?"

"You would be brought to the Headmaster's Office," Vector stated. "The Headmaster would use a spell to invade each of your minds, and review your memories and your feelings towards each other. If there's any indication that the snogging was more than curious experimentation, then he would plant a strong suggestion deep into your mind that you fancy wizards rather than witches, and alter any memories of your lesbian activity by replacing your female lover with a wizard."

"A wizard?" asked Hermione with alarm. "So what if Padma and I had been doing more than just snogging…what if I'd been eating her out?"

"Speaking hypothetically, Granger?" Pansy asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Of course," Hermione quickly replied, flushing red at the question.

Vector cocked her chin slightly, as she considered the exchange of words. "Well, Hermione," she then replied, "Dumbledore would alter your memories, so that instead of, as you say, "eating out" Padma, you would remember sucking off a male classmate, and enjoying it just as much as you had the cunnilingus."

"Ewww," shuddered Hannah. "Would she have any say in which wizard she thought that she had blown?"

Vector shook her head.

"So how does the manipulative old bastard decide?" asked Pansy.

"It varies," the Arithmancy professor replied. "In the three of four cases that I've heard about during my career here, it's either been to the closest male friend of the witch, or to a wizard that would make a favorable political alliance."

"Favorable to the Headmaster, I would imagine," stated Pansy, with Vector nodding in agreement.

Hermione shuttered at the thought, and her face turned pale.

"What's the matter, Granger?" asked Pansy. "Don't fancy the memory of giving The-Boy-Who-Lived a blowjob?"

"No," Hermione replied weakly. "I don't fancy the thought that Dumbledore would pick Ron's willie rather than Harry's."

"Not that Hermione has to worry about being placed in that situation, right, Hermione?" asked Padma.

"Erm, no….of course not," Hermione replied.

"Yeah, right," snorted Pansy.

"So is every wizard either a rapist, or misogynistic bastard?" Padma asked.

"No, not at all," the professor said with a chuckly. "That may have been my strident militancy bleeding through the talking points...of course there are gay-friendly het wizards out there."

"Getting back on track," said Hannah. "What can we, as prefects, do about these things?"

"You can, and will, protect the witches of Hogwarts," Vector replied. "Should you come across a heterosexual liaison during your patrols, you will ensure that the witch is there of her own free will, and keep the wizard from trying to escape blame."

"And if it's a homosexual couple in that broom closet?"

"You will keep their secrets for them," Vector replied. "Even if that requires you to memory charm the male prefect that you are patrolling with."

"Memory charm?" asked Hannah. "I don't know how to cast one of those."

"You will be taught," Vector replied.

"By you professor?"

"No, by the Coven."

"Which Coven?" Hermione asked.

"The Coven of Prefects," Vector stated.

"Excuse me, professor," asked Hannah, leaving the existed of a coven for a moment, "Are we being asked to literally help keep gay wizards in the closet as well?"

"Yes," Vector replied. "They get the same treatment from the Headmaster, and apart from the fairness of it all…you wouldn't want to run the risk that Dumbledore would make the wizard think that he really fancied one of you, would you?"

"Depends on the wizard," snarked Pansy.

"So, let me get this straight," Hermione said. "We've just been selected as prefects to uphold the school's rules, but we're also being unofficially asked to break school rules to protect sexually active witches and gay wizards."

"That's the gist of it," Vector replied.

"Why?"

"I thought that I just explained why," the professor stated.

"She's asking what's in it for her," said Pansy.

The older witch pursed her lips as she looked at her young charges.

"Well…to be honest, it was the opinion of both past and present female prefects that all four of you might want to act out of motivated self-interest."

As the professor's words quietly sunk in, each of the teen-aged witches blushed bright red, either from anger, embarrassment, or a combination of both.

"Are you accusing us of being witch's witches?" Hermione asked.

The Arithmancy professor closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"I couldn't accuse any of you…that would imply that I considered my own sexual preferences to be wrong in some way."

"You mean that you're…"

"Involved in a closeted loving long-term relationship with another witch?" asked Vector. "In a word….yes."

"So how did you…what makes you think that….I mean, we were so careful about it…." Hannah stammered.

"We've been tracked from the start, I imagine," Padma said quietly. "Assessed for certain tendencies, then groomed for the job."

"Yes, I'm afraid so," Vector admitted.

"So all of the female prefects are gay?" asked Hannah.

"Not all," the professor replied. "Some are gay, some are bisexual…a few are gay-friendly even as they sort it out for themselves."

"So it's all a lie," Hermione said sharply. "Being selected a prefect had nothing to do with our accomplishments, and everything to do with what or who moistens our knickers."

"Not at all, Hermione…not at all," Vector replied quickly. "There's no way that any of you could have been made a prefect without your classroom accomplishments. Especially Padma and Pansy, given the fact that it's the Heads of Houses that nominate prefects."

"So the male heads aren't involved with this…this grooming…but the female heads are?" Hermione asked.

Vector paused to bite her lower lip, then finally nodded. "The Coven has been active for more than two hundred years, and Professors McGonagall and Sprout were both prefects during their careers as students." At sight of Hermione's raised eyebrow, the elder witch quickly added, "But even their nominations have to be approved by Dumbledore, and he certainly isn't in the know on this."

Seeing that Hermione didn't seem convinced, Padma reached out and touched the Gryffindor witch's shoulder. "Hermione…you know that you deserve it, based on grades alone."

"But…"

"Besides," Padma added with a grin. "You and I both know that McGonagall would have had the same choices even if sharing another witch's bed was the only prerequisite."

"Both Lavender and Parvati, too?" asked Hannah wondrously.

"Hush, now," Vector asked. "Loose lips sink ships."

"In more ways than one," said Hermione.

"So, what if I deny liking witches," Pansy asked, "and refused to go along with this scheme, or to work with these other…hag-shaggers?"

The Arithmancy professor scowled, and drew her wand. "Mind your tongue, missy. I can't take points or issue a detention for fear of explaining why, but that wouldn't stop me from hexing you."

"Same for us," Hermione stated sharply.

Pansy turned toward the other students and found three wands pointed towards her head.

"Denying it, and buying into self-loathing will only hurt you in the end," said Hannah.

"I agree," said Vector. "But to answer your second question…none of you are required to do anything. That said, any of you who refuse to join the Coven, and to take the required unbreakable vows, will be obliviated, and more than likely replaced as prefect."

"Does that happen often, Professor?" Padma asked.

"No," Vector replied. "The Coven has always done a good job of assessing tendencies, and helping the younger witches create a prefect-worthy resume."

"When do you need our answer, Professor?" Hannah asked.

"Right now, I'm afraid," Vector replied. "It's either out the visible door with a memory charm, or through the hidden door behind me and straight away to the initiation ceremony."

The older witch allowed the four younger ones to consider their options in silence. Hermione and Padma did so whilst looking deeply into the other's eyes, as if they were engaging in a nonverbal conversation. With slight nods, they eventually stood, and reached out to grab the other's hand.

"We're in, Professor," Hermione said bravely.

Hannah Abbott stood and said, "Me too…if for no other reason than to learn the true motives of someone I expect is on the other side of that wall."

"Becky?" asked Padma.

When Hannah confirmed the identity of the seventh-year Hufflepuff prefect who had shared her bed, she was pulled into a hug by her Gryffindor and Ravenclaw counterparts.

"I'm sure that the feelings were there," Padma whispered into Hannah's ear.

"I hope so," the Hufflepuff replied, as a single tear streaked down her cheek.

"Have faith, Miss Abbott," counseled Vector.

Four sets of eyes then turned towards the last to decide.

Pansy Parkinson scowled and sputtered, but eventually stood.

"Okay, fine, count me in," she snarled. "Just don't expect me to join your pathetic group hug, much less your beds."

"Wouldn't dream of it, Pansy," Hermione said with a smile.

"Excellent….just….excellent," Vector said brightly. "I'm so proud of you…of all of you. To be so brave…"

"Or cunning?" snarked Pansy.

"Yes, or cunning," the professor admitted.

"So about this initiation ceremony?" Hannah asked. "Are we going to have to do something painful or disgusting?"

"No," her Arithmancy professor stated a smile. "Just a few drops of blood to seal your vows, and your loyalty to the coven."

The elder witch then began to unbutton her own robes. "All initiates need to strip down completely for the ceremony," she explained, adding, "But don't worry…it will only be other Coven members in the room, and we'll be naked as well."

"Gaah…I have to see Granger's bits?" whined Pansy. "I thought that you said that we didn't have to do anything disgusting?"

Hermione laughed at the insult as she dropped her robes. "Oh Pansy…I'm so glad that this isn't going to change things between us."

"It certainly won't."

But Pansy's words were betrayed by her fears, once their clothes were shed, and Professor Vector placed blindfolds around each girl's head. As the older witch used her wand to open the hidden doorway, Pansy grew nervous and reached out towards the others. After some fumbling and inadvertent gropes, the Slytherin caught the hands of two others. She thought that it was Hannah and Padma, but it was Hermione who gave Pansy's hand a squeeze as they were led naked into the adjacent candle-lit room.


	2. Chapter 2

**A Coven of Prefects**

**A/N:** Those wondering where the HP is in this HP fanfic should be patient. He's going to show up at the start of next chapter. Just need to do some more stage setting, and find something for a room full of naked witches to do...

An NC-17 version is posted on patronuscharm(dot)net. There isn't a separate lemon scene there...just some extra bits (and manipulation of bits). The Harmony, portkey-compliant version might take a bit longer, for obvious reasons.

**Disclaimer:** Not my Characters, No Money Being Made, etc., etc.

**oo00OO00oo**

**Chapter Two : So Now that You're a Member of the Coven...**

At the conclusion of the initiation ceremony, Hermione and Padma made a beeline towards the row of silk dressing gowns that hung from hooks along one wall. Hermione half-expected Pansy to be hot on their heels, teasing her about the need to cover her abysmally flat chest, but when she turned around she spied the still-naked Slytherin on the other side of the room.

"Who's the blonde that Pansy's talking with?" asked Hermione.

"Don't know," replied Padma, following her companion's gaze. "My family is clearly not a part of her social circle."

The black-haired witch then looked beyond Pansy and smiled. Hannah Abbott had also forgone the immediate benefits of covered bits, and gone straight to Becky, the seventh-year prefect. Only a few words of reassurance appeared necessary for the two Hufflepuff witches to lock themselves into a tight embrace.

"Well that's nice to see," said Padma, as she pointed the couple out to Hermione.

"Yeah, but how much more will they show us if they keep at that?" asked Hermione.

The Ravenclaw giggled as she reached behind her Gryffindor lover and squeezed her arse."You know that you like to watch…just admit it."

"Hey!" Hermione scolded, as she swatted the hand away.

"Relax, luv," Padma said with a sweep of her other arm. "Can't you see that we're amongst friends?"

When Hermione looked around the room she was forced to agree. Hannah and Becky weren't the only witches who were rekindling old friendships and exploring new ones with very public displays of affection.

"Now," Padma snarked. "if we could only convince some of the witches who should be covering themselves to wear their robes, the view would be perfect."

"Padma!"

"Am I wrong?" her lover asked. "Though…it's nice to see that at least a few of the hard bodies are still on display."

"Should I be jealous right about now?"

"Of course not," Padma replied sweetly. "You're on the top of my looks better naked' short-list."

"Lying only makes it worse, you know," replied Hermione.

"I am not lying," Padma stated firmly.

"Then you've turned a blind eye to Cho Chang," Hermione hissed. She stared across the room at the nude sixth-year prefect, who was presently chatting up Pomona Sprout. "There ought to be a law against tits that big on a frame that small."

"Oh, Hermione," the Ravenclaw sighed. "Do I need to prove how much I love your breasts by pulling open your robe and worshipping them with my tongue?"

Pulling the front of her robe more closely together, Hermione shook her head.

"Oh quit being so modest," Padma chided, as she reached over and tweaked one of Hermione's covered nipples. "Take a look around, and tell me that that you don't belong on my wish she were naked' list?"

The fifth-year Gryffindor slapped the tweaking fingers away and rolled her eyes. But even as she insisted that Padma add herself to her list, she was forced to admit that her girlfriend had a small point. Most of the Coven hadn't bothered with covering themselves as they broke into small groups and engaged in small talk. And many of the witches who had taken robes down from the hooks hadn't bothered to tie them, leaving wide, continuous swaths of exposed flesh down their fronts.

"Well," Hermione said in assessment, "they all look pretty good to me, especially considering how old some of them are." She nodded towards a grey-haired witch and added, "I can only hope my arse is that firm when I'm her age."

"I hope that it is too," Padma grinned. "You still are a babe in the woods, aren't you luv? Magic is the cure-all for saggy breasts and cellulite."

Hermione sighed, and look down towards her chest. "So why, then, isn't there a potion to grow tits?"

Her lover smiled as she reached back and covered Hermione's left breast with her opened right hand."Again with the poor self-esteem…I like them this way, Hermione," she cooed. "Besides, would you trust Snape to brew that potion for you?"

"Padma!" Hermione hissed, slapping away her hand.The Ravenclaw giggled as she dropped the offending hand to her side and tightly grabbed hold of Hermione's.

"Relax, luv," she whispered, as she pulled herself against Hermione and nuzzled against her neck. "Who's going to notice?"

Hermione's eyes went wide as she pushed Padma away."

My Head of House, for one," the Gryffindor wined. "And she's heading this way now."

Padma looked over her shoulder, then turned back and smirked.

"Nice pussy."

"Padma!"

"What? I was talking about her tattoo.".

The fifth-year Gryffindor raised herself onto her toes so that she could see over Padma's shoulder. To her great surprise, her open-robed Head of House did have a magically-animated tattoo...a crotch-level tabby cat, who was perched on top of the Professor's unruly triangular mound of hair.

Hermione almost died when the small cat pounced, and swatted at a few stray pubes as if they were a ball of yarn.

She really almost died when she looked up and realized that McGonagall had caught her staring.

The Transfiguration smiled slyly, as she closed the distance between them and closed the front of her robes.

"Hermione, I trust, for Padma's sake, that you were admiring my tabby tattoo?"

"Erm…yes, of course, Professor," Hermione stammered, as she inspected the condition of her own toenails.

"None of that formality here, if you please," the Professor stated. "Coven members use their sister's given names…at least when it is safe to do so."

"Yes, Profess…erm, Minerva."

"That's better," the Gryffindor head said. "Now, would you allow this old witch the honor of welcoming you into the coven with a hug?"

Hermione smiled, and nodded her head (after she reassured herself that the robes they each wore were appropriately concealing).

"You too, Padma," the Transfiguration Professor declared, pulling the Ravenclaw into a separate embrace.

"Oh, there's so much to talk about...but we'll have plenty of time for that. I should introduce you to the alumnae before we sneak them back out of the castle."

"Sneak them out, Profess..erm, Minerva?" Hermione asked.

Her Head of House nodded. "It wouldn't do for the Headmaster to wonder why fifty witches descend upon the castle on the first day each school year."

"So…where are we?" Padma asked, taking a good look around the room.

"The Coven's Lounge," McGonagall replied. "When we aren't performing initiations it serves as your female prefect's lounge, protected by Male-Repelling Wards that affect anyone with a penis."

"So that includes the Headmaster, then?" Padma snarked.

"Do you think that I'd really be in a position to know?" the Assistant Headmistress teased.

"Erm, no…not really."

"Well I strongly suspect that he does, in any event," Minerva replied. "But even if he didn't...there's the castle to fall back on."

"The Castle?"

Minerva nodded. "Over the years the Coven has enlisted the help of Hogwarts herself to keep the Coven's secrets."

"Hogwarts, herself?" asked Hermione. "As in, the castle is sentient, Hogwarts, herself?"

Minerva smiled. "Yes…it is semi-sentient, at least. The castle serves the Headmaster, just like the portraits in his office. They can commune, or at least Albus claims that they commune, on matters affecting the castle's security and its wards."

"But it keeps quiet about the Coven, and this room?"

The Transfiguration Professor smiled. "At the time of its construction, each of the Four Founders sacrificed a small part of their own souls to make Hogwarts come alive. And since one of the female Founders loved to lick cauldrons..."

"Really?" asked Hermione. "Which one?"

Minerva patted her young charge on the shoulder and nodded towards a bank of bookshelves."You'll find the answer within the Coven's library, Hermione," she said with a smile. "There's enough there to support a hundred Masteries in Witch's Studies, were the Ministry ever to recognize the value of such a course of study."

Hermione's eyes began to glaze over as she gravitated towards the rows of ancient tomes.

"Down, girl!" said Padma, pulling on Hermione's arm as if it were a leash.

"Yes, dear," Hermione sighed.

"Later, Hermione...plenty of time later," added her Head of House.The older witch then led the two towards their first introductions...an ancient witch who said that she expected great things from Padma and Hermione when she returned at the end of the school year to proctor their O.W.L.s. From there they moved onto a Chaser that played for the Harpies, then to the Matriarch of the House of Cadwell. These interactions spanned the next ninety minutes oftime, and involved all four of the new initiates, with Professor Vector shepherding Hannah and Pansy around the room.

It was, Hermione later reflected, a rather eclectic group…not just in terms of professions, or social status, but with respect to "Light" and "Dark." The latter was no more starkly illustrated by the last two to be introduced by the Assistant Headmistress.

"Padma, Hermione," Minerva said, "allow me to introduce you to Amelia Bones and Narcissa Malfoy."

Hermione Granger was mesmerized by jiggling breasts as she shook the blonde witch's hand. She would have never thought she'd have reason to be jealous of Draco Malfoy. But then again, she would have never thought that she'd be shaking hands with his near-naked mum and staring at her brilliant tits.

The smartest witch in her generation knew that all witches breast-fed their children, no matter how rich or aristocratic they were. The expressed milk carried trace amounts of the mother's magic, and was thought necessary to stimulate the growth of the child's magical core. So it stood to reason that baby Draco had spent a lot of time doing what Hermione was now fantasizing about doing...suckling on Narcissa's gravity-defying breasts and nibbling on her nearly translucent pink nipples.

It took her lover's whispered words and the tickling of her warm breath against her ear to divert her attention.

"So should I be the jealous one, now?" asked Padma.

Hermione shook her head, and gathered her wits. She was glad to see that both Padma and Narcissa looked more bemused by Hermione's stare than angry.

"It is a pleasure to see you again, Hermione," purred the Malfoy Matriarch, as she gave the younger witch's hand a firm squeeze, and caressed the back of the hand with her thumb.

"I'm sorry, Narcissa, but I didn't realize that we've met before," Hermione replied.

The taller witch smiled and pulled the sides of her opened robe tightly against her chest. Adopting a dismissive expression that looked as if something foul-smelling was perched under her nose, she then asked, "Perhaps this might refresh your memory?"

Hermione's eyes widened. "Of course...you were in the boxes at the Quidditch World Cup last year."

When Mrs. Malfoy gave a confirmatory nod, Hermione added, "But you look so different that way, so much more..."

"Haughty and irritated?"

"Erm, well..."

Narcissa smiled and dropped the grip on her robes, which allowed both her warm expression and her magnificent breasts to return to view.

"I'm afraid that I always look irritated when I'm within twenty yards of my husband."

"Oh...really?" asked Hermione. "Does that mean that..."

Narcissa shot her hand out and stopped Hermione mid-question with a firm grasp of her arm."In a moment, dear," she told the younger witch. She then turned to the Assistant Headmistress, who'd watch the exchange with great interest, and asked, "Have you finished bringing these two lovely witches around for introductions, Minnie?"

The Gryffindor Head of House snorted when Hermione gasped at the familiarity of Narcissa's question.

"I am indeed, Cissy."

"Then would you allow me to steal your young charge away for a few moments? I'd be more than happy to give Hermione the complete tour of our little lair."Minerva's eyes narrowed as she quietly assessed Narcissa's intentions.

Amelia Bones had been exchanging a greeting with Padma, even as she monitored the exchange between Narcissa and Hermione.

"Excuse me for a moment dear," she asked the Ravenclaw. Amelia then turned towards the Assistant Headmistress and said, "I'll be more than happy to stay by Cissy's side as she completes Padma's and Hermione's tour."

McGonagall frowned, turned towards Hermione, and reluctantly replied, "I'll leave it to them to decide."

Hermione bit her lower lip. There was some heady politics at play here, and she didn't like feeling as if she were a piece in a chess match.

"So now I know how Harry must feel at times," she thought to herself.

Amelia tried to expedite the decision by stepping forward and whispering into Hermione's ear. The younger witch was only mildly distracted by the fact that this act placed the naked breasts of the most powerful witch within the Ministry of Magic against her arm.

"There is much more to Cissy than her status as the Lady Malfoy," stated Amelia. "She and I both need to talk with you privately before we leave tonight, and the tour will present the perfect place to speak where prying ears can't here."

Hermione squinted in confusion. She turned her head so that she could whisper a response into the older witch's ear."Why are we whispering? Can't you just cast a privacy or silencing charm?"

Amelia's eyes sparkled, and nudged Hermione's cheek with her nose so that she could whisper back."If you haven't already noticed, I've no place to store my wand."

Hermione glanced down at the MLE Director's nude form. Amelia was one of the witches who hadn't even bothered to drape and opened robe over her shoulders.The elder witch used the time spent glancing to finish her whispered sales pitch.

"Hermione, I promise you that you and Padma will be safe, and that you can trust Narcissa."

Hermione frowned, and pulled the older witch into a whisper-friendly hug."Why do you trust the wife of Lucius Malfoy, Director Bones?"

Amelia nodded and smiled. Deciding that her reply was worthy of sharing, she took a step back. Speaking quietly enough for only their little group to hear, she replied, "Because even though Cissy knows where I sleep at night, the only thing that she's ever attacked me with is her tongue."

The look of surprise on the faces of the two younger witches was surpassed only by the Assistant Headmistress's gobsmacked expression."Amelia? You and...You and Cissy?" Minerva stammered.T

he MLE Director turned towards the Lady Malfoy, shrugged her shoulders, and reached out her hand."We knew that this might be necessary, luv."

Mrs. Malfoy snorted. "Yes, but as long as it is necessary, I'm not going to settle for just holding hands…"

As the blonde witch moved closer to kiss her monocle-wearing secret lover, Amelia kept her distance.

"Save it for later, sweetheart…no need to get reckless."

The Lady Malfoy pouted. "But hardly anybody else waited," she replied with a sweep of her hand.

The MLE Director looked about the room, and noticed several couples that were intently coupling.

"Hardly anyone else has as much to lose as either of us either, Cissy," she whispered.

"Alright," whined the blond-haired witch. "But you owe me a different kind of tongue lashing later on."

"Which I'll happily provide, dear," Amelia said in quiet reply.

Hermione Granger had followed this back-and-forth risking the entrance of nargles into her opened mouth. She was forced to close it when the secret lovers both turned towards her.

"Well?" asked Narcissa.

Hermione paused, then turned towards Padma. When the Ravenclaw witch shrugged and nodded her head, Hermione turned back towards the Headmistress and said, "We'll be find…go ahead, Prof….Minerva. Or is it Minnie?"

The Transfiguration Professor snorted. "Don't push your luck, Hermione."

With one more questioning glance towards Amelia Bones (that was answered by a head nod), the Head of Gryffindor House hugged the two young witches and retired for the night.

"Right, then," said Narcissa firmly, as she grabbed Hermione's hand. "Let's give you two the grand tour."

As Amelia took Padma's hand and followed closely behind, the Lady Malfoy pulled Hermione forward at a very brisk pace."So, we're presently in the Coven's Lair...this main area will ordinarily be set up like a common room, with desks and comfy chairs. Moving on, this is the lavatory..."

Hermione tried to peak into the lav as the older witch pushed its door open, but was prevented by the tug on her arm and Narcissa's strident pace.

"So that's the lavatory, and here's the last part of the tour...the Private Dining Room."

Draco's mother turned the gold handle that was mounted on the green door and pushed in, dragging Hermione into a space that looked, smelled, and sounding nothing at all like the Great Hall at dinnertime.

The large, low-ceilinged room was dark, and illuminated by only a handful of scented candles. Hermione heard a soft moan from behind her, and smiled at what she knew was her lover's reaction to the room's heady mixture of aromas...sandalwood, jasmine, and…sex. Her single moan joined a chorus of polyphonic groans, moans, and shrieks that came different parts of the room.

Instead of tables and chairs, there were plush carpets and soft pillows. Instead of uniformed students sorted by house, there were naked witches sorted only by orientation. And instead of forks and knives, there were...well, from Hermione's standpoint there was no equivalent of forks and knives, since the kind of eating that was taking place in the room didn't require utensils (unless you labeled the toys some were using on each other as such).

"So, ladies, this is our Private Dining Room," said Narcissa to the two new Coven members. "The Room has rules and traditions to be followed, just like the Great Hall...although the rules themselves are quite dissimilar."

"Why am I not surprised?" Hermione asked, as she tried hard not to stare at the threesome writhing closest to the door.

"The first rule is...what happens in the Dining Room, stays in the Dining Room...it's part of the secrecy vows you took earlier tonight.

"Does that include unintentional disclosures, say from use of veritaserum or a Legimens attack?" Padma asked.

"Yes," replied Amelia Bones. "Don't worry, you'll be given Occlumancy lessons over the next few weeks."

"Second rule," Narcissa stated. "Abandon clothing, all ye who are about to enter."The Malfoy matriarch backed up her statement by shrugging off her opened robed and letting it drop to the ground.

"No need to delay, ladies," the blonde witch stated, gesturing towards the closed robes that still covered Hermione and Padma.

The two younger witches looked at each other and shrugged, as they untied their robes and let them fall to their feet.

"Lovely, just lovely," Narcissa said with a wide grin.

"What's lovely?" Hermione quipped. "Our compliance with the rules, or the sight of our naked bodies?"

"Must I make a choice?" the Malfoy matriarch replied brightly, her eyes darting back and forth between the two students as if there were more than one choice to be made.

"Hem-hem," interrupted Amelia, using her best imitation of her least-favorite Wizengamot colleague.

"Must you remind me of that loathsome toad?" Narcissa asked.

"The third and final rule, Cissy?" asked Amelia.

"Yes, yes...the third and final rule of the Dining Room involves hospitality. Any Coven member that enters the room alone will be invited to dine with somebody else."

"Enforced group sex?" Hermione asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Not necessarily," interjected Amelia. "More like shared sex...if there are only couples, then she'd be invited into a three-way. But if there are already groups of three or more, somebody from one of the groups could peel off and pair up with the single.

"Which is about to happen if the four of us don't soon pair up or form our own group," Cissy noted.

"But we're always free to leave the room, or to decline an offer, right?" asked Hermione.

"Always free to leave…of course," Cissy replied. "But we don't care for gawkers, and it's bad form to turn down a willing offer."

"So, we should..."

"So we should pair up, or form a group of four, and continue our conversation as we pretend to lock lips."

"Why pretend, Amelia?" Cissy asked with a grin.

"It'd be hard for you to talk to Hermione if my lips were locked with yours, wouldn't it?" asked the MLE Director.

"Depends on which of my lips you were clamped down on, sweetheart."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Is this really necessary?"

"What?" asked Narcissa. "Are you telling me that you're going to pass on the chance to snog your girlfriend senseless while I whisper the Dark Lord's secrets into your ear?"

"Oh, you make it sound so romantic," snarked Amelia. She stepped forward, grabbed the blonde witch's hand, and turned back to the younger witches.

"Padma, Hermione, nobody is forcing you two to share...why don't you just couple up for now, and if you want to snog, find a spot to snog next to Cissy and me?"

Hermione cocked an eyebrow towards Padma in askance.

Padma pursed her lips for a moment, then let them relax into a smile. She reached for Hermione's hand, and dragged her deeper into the room.

**oo00OO00oo**

Hermione and Padma had never been shy when it came time to sharing their bodies with each other, so no ground was broken as Padma made love to her lover. But the public part of their activity…that was new and different. Rather exciting, as well, given the brazenness of it all.

And then there was the running conversation, which was necessarily brief and to the point.

"So...sum-mmmmmh!...summarize," panted Hermione. "You...hate husband...always have...arranged-d-d-d-Doh! Padma!...arranged marriage."

"Yesssss!" Narcissa replied, as Amelia did something particularly pleasurable to her.

"Lucius...gone round bend...You-know-who…back again...again, Padma...Please, again!...sorry…"

"S'okay," Narcissa gasped.

"Want...help...want...divorce...need help..Sirius...Head?"

"Yes, Oh, Sweet...Morgana's Tits...Yes, that's good head!!"

Hermione stopped her summary and allowed the older witch to catch her breath. Padma used the break in conversation to bring Hermione over the edge.

By the time that the fifth-year Gryffindor got her breathing under control and opened her eyes, there was a different witch sitting next to her.

"My turn," Amelia said.

"Is it something that you could tell Padma while I return her favors?"

Amelia smiled and shook her head. "Not enough time to provide background, I'm afraid…Cissy works fast, especially when she's a nasty-little witch and sticks her finger up my-ei-ei-ei!"

"Like that, sweetheart?" Narcissa asked from behind.

Amelia just shook her head in wonderment, and turned her head towards Padma. "Can Hermione make it up to you later, hon?"

"Sure," the light-brown-skinned witch replied, as she took a break from her efforts and rested her head against Hermione's thigh.

"Thanks, Padma. So, Hermione...Dolores Umbridge is a complete bitch, but also a very dangerous witch. She's so deep inside Fudge's pocket there's no room for...mmmmmmm!"

"Don't think I want to imagine Umbridge moaning like that inside Fudge's pocket," Hermione quipped.

"Yes, well...she's…not in Coven…couldn't be a prefect with only three Oh-oh-oh!"

"Three O.W.L.s?"

"Yes, thanksssss…" the monocle-less witch hissed. "Feels so good, Cissy...Susan, my niece...afraid to ask for help...might...not know…"

"Susan might not know what, Amelia?"

"Umbridge...making a run at Harry Potter. Already has tried...wants to finish-sh-sh-sh-i-t! that feels good, Cissy...Hermione...you're Harry's...friend...need to help...protect...tell me."

"You want me to be your eyes and ears in the castle?"

"Yes...don't trust Headmaster."

"But what about Minerva?"

"Being closely watched...has to protect...position to help...female students...caught…"

"She's not going to make waves for fear of being sacked."

"She wants to…coven needs her there...all costs…"

"But how will I contact you?"

"Prefect's badge...special...charm…two-way commmmm..."

"Two-way communication device?"

"Yesssss...ask Minerva…tomorrow..."

"Okay, I will," Hermione promised. "So is there anything else, Amelia?"

"Nothing that can't wait...not you, Cissy, keep going!"

Hermione smiled, and reached down to squeeze the MLE Director's hand."Fair enough," she said. "Now if you'll excuse me, Amelia, I've got work to do."

Amelia could only manage a smile and a wink of her eye in reply, as Narcissa began to pick up the pace of her ministrations.

Hermione reached down in between her legs and caressed Padma's cheek.

"So what do you think, luv?" she asked. "Want to try it their way?"

"You mean from behind...with your tongue...and your finger wiggling..."

Hermione grinned. "Up to you."

The Ravenclaw prefect chuckled as she kissed her lover deeply, then gave a nod towards the look on the MLE Director's face.

"Why mess with a winning formula?"


	3. Chapter 3

**A Coven of Prefects**

**Important Author's Note:** This story started out with parallel versions...one Hr/Padma (hosted here and on patronuscharm(dog)net ) and the other H/Hr (hosted on portkey(dot)org ). After careful deliberation, I have decided to pursue only the H/Hr version for now. This chapter is taken from the harmony version, which is now posted on as "A Coven of Prefects - Harmony Version." It should make sense, though, if you ignore the ship stuff.

Future updates will only be made to that story. Since there were signficant changes/additions to the Harmony version, you may want to reread from the start. As I may come back and try to work through some of the issues that made the original version less appealing to me, I'm keeping this posted and "on hiatus."

**Disclaimer:** Not my characters, no money being made, etc., etc.

**Chapter 3: Hermione the Conspirator**

Given the late hour, Hermione Granger was worried that the Fat Lady would be asleep, or worse...that she was off wandering through the castle's portraits, making it impossible to enter the Tower. But to Hermione's surprise, the pink dress-wearing portraiture was not only awake, but entertaining.

"Oh, there you are, dear," the Fat Lady said brightly. "You've met my friend Violet, haven't you?"

Hermione glanced towards the woman who was sitting next to the portal guardian and nodded.

"Erm, yes...last year during Yule, I think."

"Ah, what a splendid memory," remarked Violet, who was dressed in a Restoration-Era gown. She then raised the goblet of wine in her hand and said, "We've been waiting to toast the newest female Gryffindor Prefect."

"Erm, thank you," Hermione replied, taking note of the three empty bottles of wine on the table.

The guarding of Gryffindor's portal emptied her wine glass, set it on the table, then leaned forward in her chair. Looking up and down the hallway and noting that Hermione was alone, the Fat Lady beckoned the young witch to put her ear against the painting's canvas.

The muggleborn witch frowned a bit, but turned her head to one side and leaned against the painting.

"We just wanted you to know," the Fat Lady whispered, "that we're with you, Sister."

Hermione's eyes went wide as she jumped back from the canvas and turned back towards the Fat Lady. The portrait giggled and put her finger up against her lips.

"Sssshhhhh!" she said with twinkling eyes. The portrait raised her other hand up from under the table, showing Hermione that it was grasped to the hand of her guest. Bringing her companion's hands to her lips for a kiss, the Fat Lady winked.

"We've had our eye on you for some time, Hermione," she proclaimed. "Should you need help completing your assigned Coven tasks, or want some tips on how to catch the eye of a witch you might fancy..."

Hermione bit her lower lip, trying desperately not to imagine the intimate activities of the portrait-bound witches (much less exactly how and where they'd been watching her).

"Thanks," she finally was able to spit out. "I'll be sure to remember that..._Mimbulus mimbletonia_."

"Of course sweetheart," the portrait replied, as the doorway swung open. "Sweet dreams."

"Erm...you too."

When the door closed behind her, Hermione put her hands to her head and sighed. She'd see a lot of very strange things within the wizarding world, but a portrait coming out of the closet had to rank high on her list of odd.

The common room was surprisingly empty. Sure, it was almost one in the morning, but Hermione had expected at least one or two students awake, trying desperately to complete their summer assignments before the first day of classes. She was disappointed that Harry hadn't stayed up and waited for her return, but she also understood why he probably hadn't...if their housemate's dinner table whispers and stares had carried over into their Common Room, he would have sought refuge behind the curtains of his bed.

Hermione made her way up the stairs to the girl's dormitories, anxious to reach her own refuge from what was a thought-provoking (and memory-searing) evening. Her school trunk still needed to be unpacked, and her books sorted out...any other year she would have waited until morning, afraid that her activity would wake the others. But given the covert, lust-filled glares that Lavender and Parvati had shared across the Gryffindor table earlier that evening, she fully expected them to be awake and bouncing. Bouncing not off the walls of the dorm, but off of each other.

As she approached the shared Fifth-Year's dorm, Hermione opened the second season of the mental game show that she'd made up the previous year...a take-off of "Let's Make a Deal."

She called it _"Let's Guess Where They Squeal"._

The object of the game was to determine whether Lavender and Parvati were sharing a bed (and each other) behind Curtain #1, or Curtain #2. The game's challenge came from the fact that they usually used a silencing spell...Hemione would then have to look for secondary clues...like a foot sticking out from the curtains that had the "wrong" skin tone. Or two feet sticking out from the curtains with different skin tones.

The hushed whispers coming from Parvati's bed ended the game almost before Hermione entered the room. She smiled, shook her head, and made her way to her trunk. The muggleborn made no efforts to listen into the conversation...while it was great fun to eavesdrop as Lavender talked dirty to her black-haired lover, Hermione had gotten more than enough titillation during the initiation.

But as she was reaching for a handful of books to transfer to her bookshelf, she thought that she heard the name "Harry" whispered. Hemione froze, and glanced at the curtained bed across the room. The whispering was too soft to make out what was being said. The muggleborn witch would have shrugged it off, until she glanced back down into her trunk and spied her Extendable Ear (that the Weasley Twins had given her in a preemptive effort to soften their new prefect up). Against her better judgment, she grabbed the magical device and goaded the working end to sneak up underneath Parvati's bed curtains.

What she heard made her blood boil.

Taking barely enough time to retrieve the ear and pocket it, a furious Hermione Granger strode across the room and whipped open the bed curtains.

"Lavender Brown, you ought to be ashamed of yourself!"

The brown-haired witch, who had been rolling her own nipples between her fingers as she sat naked upon Parvati's face, looked up at Hermione with a "caught in the headlights" look.

"Eeeep!"

She leapt off of Parvati's face and hid her body behind her lover's, until she could hide both of their sweat-slicked bodies with a drawn bedsheet. Parvati, meanwhile, turned onto her side, rubbed her face with the edge of her blanket, and faced Hermione.

"I thought that you were okay with us," she said. "You...you haven't gotten all Percy-ish now that you're a prefect, have you?"

"No, not at all...that's a separate issue...although how Lavender can be bad mouthing Harry while you're mouthing her bits..."

"Ah, so that's it," Lavender replied, popping her head up to speak. "It's about your boyfriend."

"Harry is not my boyfriend, you bint," Hermione hissed. "Otherwise, yes...this is about Harry. How dare you suggest that he's lying about You-Know-Who's Return, and that his brain has gone as soft as his dick!"

"You know otherwise, Hermione?"

"Yes, of course I do," Hermione replied. "He's telling the truth, no matter what the _Daily Prophet _writes and you parrot back."

Lavender snorted. "I think you're awfully protective of somebody that you say isn't your boyfriend." She then looked down and asked, "What do you think Parv?"

Padma's twin shot her eyes towards Hermione and frowned.

"I think that it's time Little Miss Prefect shove off," she stated, and reached to close the bed curtains.

But Hermione didn't consider the conversation finished. She blocked the curtains with one hand and drew her wand with the other.

"_Petrificus Totalus_!"

"What the..."

"_Petrificus Totalus_!"

With her dormmates silenced and immobilized, Hermione pushed the two rigid bodies away from the edge of the bed so that she could have a seat. As Lavender had been riding "reverse cowgirl", this motion shoved Parvati crotch over Lavender's face, and Hermione hand to make some adjustments so that she could see both sets of eyes.

"Sorry about that, although...it's not like that's a new position for you two," Hermione said with a smile.

"So, Ladies...if you two can trust me not to report you bedtime activities to the Head of House or worse...the Headmaster...then you two damn better trust me when I say that Harry Potter is telling the truth. He isn't lying, the Headmaster isn't senile, and V-V-Voldmort is back."

The eyes within the two naked bodies showed fear. Hermione thought at first it was because she had dared to say the Dark Lord's name, but then considered the possibility that they were worried that she'd out them. The Fifth-Year prefect then started worry to that she was using her power to threaten to do something that the vows she had made earlier wouldn't allow her to do.

"Look, I sorry about getting angry...well, no I'm not. I'm sorry that I jinxed you when you both were clearly wandless. It's just so frustrating to see the reactions towards Harry at the Opening Feast...he's got enough to worry about then to have to deal with that crap."

There was a pause in the one-way conversation, as Hermione pondered what to do. Thinking back to her Coven vows, and what they entailed, an idea struck. She took her wand in hand once more, but this time aimed it at herself.

"On my life and magic, I swear that I have no reason not to believe that Voldemort has returned, or that Harry Potter lied to me about the manner of that return."

Hermione held her breath for a moment, chiding herself for not thinking through the vow more carefully. She then pointed her wand towards her nude dormmates and said, "_Finite Incantatum_."

To her great relief, the spell was powered.

Lavender's eyes went wide, once the spell cancellation allowed her to moisten them with several blinks.

"Risking your life and magic just to bolster's Harry's reputation? Merlin, Hermione...you do have it bad for him."

"No matter."

"Of course it matters! Tell me...have you two snogged yet?"

"He's not my boyfriend, Lavender," Hermione protested. "We haven't snogged."

"Haven't snogged yet?"

"No."

"Willing to make another magical vow on that?"

Hermione scowled, and slapped her roommate playfully on the bum.

"Of course not...can't get into the habit."

"Into the habit of kissing Harry?"

"No, silly...the habit of making unbreakable vows...magic has a way of twisting your words."

The three witches then engaged in a conversation that bounced back and forth between Hermione's imaginary love life, the other two's real love life, and Harry Potter. The awkward disparity in amount of attire was reduced when Hermione got up to change into her nightgown. That act expanded the conversation farther, as the bushy-haired witch was once again forced to explain her minimal tan lines and Brazilian cut.

It was more of a girly gossip session than Hermione had ever had with her Lavender and Parvati, and she was surprisingly happy about that. Ron and Harry were still her closest friends, and it looked like she might have a new close friend with Padma, but that didn't mean that Hermione didn't want (or yearn for) the occasional opportunity to engage in girl talk within the sanctity of her bedroom.

By the time they finally fell asleep, Hermione was fairly hopeful that she'd been able to bring both Parvati and Lavender around to Harry's side of the story. They were only two of the many who had doubted, but one had to start somewhere. This comforted her enough to push her fears for Harry's mental well-being aside, which allowed her to push her knickers aside so that she could think of Harry's physical side...and what she'd want to eat if only the Coven's Private Dining Room was co-ed.

**oo00OO00oo**

Not wishing to miss Harry before he left for breakfast, Hermione forced herself to rise early the next morning, despite her lack of sleep. This had the added benefit of getting her to the gang showers before the other girls did...there was enough to do without explaining her nearly all-around tan over and over again.

As the warm water flowed down over her tanned skin, Hermione thought back on the brief conversations with Amelia Bones and Narcissa Malfoy. Cissy's claim that she had reason to believe Hermione had been in contact with Sirius was very disturbing, given the fact that Lucius had been on the station platform when Sirius, in animagus form, had escorted them onto the train. It also gave support to the theory that Draco had used the word "dogging" on purpose, intimating that he knew about their connection to the Azkaban escapee.

Sirius had been much too reckless for his own good. And for Harry's own good as well, she decided. Hermione desperately needed a way to contact him, and to warn him to stay hidden behind Grimmauld's wards. But how was she to do that, given Mad-Eye's warning to assume that every letter sent out by owl would be monitored?

That question was still rolling around her head as Hermione packed her bag full of books, pinned her prefects badge above her left breast, and bounded down the stairs.

The Weasley Twins' advertisement for willing test subjects caught her eye while she waited for Harry. She shook her head as she tore the sign from the board, upset not only at the Twins, but at Ron. He had been in the Tower last night while she was at the Initiation Ceremony...he could have and should have dealt with this sort of thing.

Not that she expected him to.

Hermione loved Ron like a brother, but he really had no business being a Prefect. She decided to raise the issue when she had her private meeting with Minerva...erm, Professor McGonagall, that is (must learn to keep situations straight, she thought to herself). Harry was the obvious choice, although...if she was on patrol and was forced to memory charm the male prefect walking with her, much better that it be Ron. Unless she could convince the Coven to let Harry in on their secret. After all, Amelia Bones had expressed her desire to help Harry the night previous. Except that her offer might have been a personal one, rather than on behalf of the Coven…

The weave of disparate motivations within the game she'd just been thrust into was most vexing.

Harry walked down the stairs and into the Common Room an angry young wizard, and was taking it out on everyone but those who deserved his wrath. Hermione asked what was wrong, and was told that Seamus had set him off. Hermione thought she was just moving the conversation forward when she mentioned that Lavender had also expressed doubts, but Harry took her head off, deciding that it must have meant that she thought that way too. Stung by the rebuke, she pointed out that she had believed him from the start, and in fact made an effort to convince Lavender and Parvati to give Harry the benefit of the doubt...at least until evidence came forward one way or the other.

The raven-haired wizard had just muttered an apology to his best friend when the two Doubting Tomasinas in question walked into the common room giggling. They stopped short when they saw the other three, and swallowed their laughter. Parvati made eye contact with Lavender and nudged her towards the Boy-Who-Lived.

"I'm sorry, Harry," Lavender told him. "I know it's not an excuse, but between _Teen Witch Weekly _and my mum and dad...they believe whatever the Ministry tells them to believe, and well...I'm supposed to be a Gryffindor, but it's hard to go against your parents...know what I mean?"

Harry shot the witch a hard stare. "No, Lavender, I don't know what you mean."

The brown-haired witch blanched. "Oh, Merlin, I'm so...what a stupid thing for me to say."

"S'okay," Harry said glumly.

"Of course it isn't, Harry," said Lavender, who then leaned forward and kissed Harry on the cheek.

"What was that...?"

"You looked like you could use a hug."

"But you... it wasn't a hug."

"Oh, my goof, then," said Lavender as she pulled him into a hug. "There, that's it."

Parvati looked on with amusement...she would have been hard pressed to say who amongst the Golden Trio looked the most shocked. Giving her friend a three-second count, she stepped up and touched lover's shoulder.

"My turn, Lavender."

Harry pulled out from his awkward hug and stared at Hermione, wondering why she hadn't mentioned Parvati betrayal as well.

"So you believed the lies about me lying too?"

"Not really...hard to with my sister talking back to the newspaper each morning."

"Then why is it your turn?"

"Because I didn't defend you when others were gossiping on the train," Parvati replied, before planting a chaste peck on Harry's opposite cheek.

"Oh, well...that's okay..."

"No it isn't, and I'm going to do my best to stop the gossiping."

"Wow, that's saying something, isn't it?" Ron asked.

"Shut it, you," Harry said. "Look, Parvati...you don't have to...I mean...why would you?"

"Because you're worth it Harry...even if you and Ron were lousy dates last year."

"And I'm going to have an even lousier attitude if I miss breakfast this morning," Ron proclaimed. He pulled Harry away from the girls and said, "Let's go eat, mate."

As they made their way out of the portal, the three witches heard Ron ask, "So do you think you'll get a kiss every time somebody changes their opinion about you?"

Harry shook his head. "If that means that Seamus will eventually try for a snog, I certainly don't."

Hermione waited until the portal closed before she turned on her dormmates.

"I hope, for Harry's sake and your own that you two were sincere."

"Of course we were," Lavender replied.

"And what's with the kisses? And the hug?"

"Jealous, Hermione?" Parvati asked with a smile. "Have to admit, the physical contact did seem to calm him down."

"It did, didn't it?" asked Lavender. "Maybe we should catch up in case there's some stares and whispers along the way?"

"I'll take care of that, thank you very much," said Hermione.

"Well, then go, girl," said Parvati. "Wouldn't do if Ron was the only one within snogging distance of Harry."

"So far as we know," Lavender giggled.

Hermione shook her head and left the room as a catty reply from Parvati caused her lover to giggle even louder.

**oo00OO00oo**

Breakfast was just as tense as the previous night's feast. If it weren't for the fact that the Firsties needed shepherding, and that McGonagall hadn't yet come around with schedules, Hermione would have suggested that they grab some rashers of bacon and eat out on the front steps. The stares and not-even-close-to-a-whisper comments were so biting and nasty...if her dormmates were correct about physical contact being an effective countermeasure, Hermione would soon need to duck under the table and blow Harry off.

Which was a lovely, if impractical, thought.

When their Head of House finally did come around, Hermione's gaze involuntarily migrated towards the older witch's crotch. It was of course, covered with robes, but that just made Hermione wonder what the tabby cat might be doing while it was out of sight.

"Searching for something, Miss Granger?"

"Erm, not really Min...erm, Professor."

The Transfiguration Professor snorted. "Well, here are your schedules, then."

Hermione nodded as she glanced at her parchment. "Are we..."

"Very busy today?" asked Minerva, as she glanced nervously towards the Head Table. "Yes, I think we all are."

"But last..."

A quick shake of the Professor's head shut down Hermione's question.

"Oh, right then." Hermione looked back down at her schedule and asked, "Why do I have time blocked out for the Infirmary each day after lunch?"

"You have a job interview with the Hogwarts Matron."

"A job interview?"

"That's what I said, Miss Granger...need we make time for a hearing test as well?"

"But...what kind of job?"

"Madame Pomfrey takes on a student each year to serve as a Nurse's Aide," the Gryffindor Head stated. "It is usually given to a sixth-year, but I suggested to the Headmaster..."

Minerva gave Harry a glance and smiled. "Well, given Mr. Potter's talent for finding injurious situations, I suggested that he would benefit from having a friend who was trained in basic methods of healing and hex removals."

"No need to make Hermione's schedule any busier on my account," offered Harry.

Hermione whacked Harry in the arm. "Stop that, you."

"Ouch, what are you trying to do...make me your first patient?"

Shaking her head, the Fifth-Year Prefect looked back towards the Transfiguration Professor.

"I'm not so sure that it's...I mean it is our O.W.L. year... and I have prefect duties..."

"This was discussed during our last staff meeting, Miss Granger. All of your professors expressed confidence in your ability to successfully manage your time."

"All?" asked Ron, glancing towards the Head Table. "Even Umbridge?"

"That's Professor Umbridge, Mr. Weasley...perhaps I should have said all of the teachers in attendance at the meeting."

"So that means Snape, too?" asked Harry.

At Minerva's raised eyebrow, Harry spat out, "I meant Professor Snape."

"Professor Snape's silent response was interpreted as a glowing recommendation," Minerva stated with a wry smile. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to finish distributing schedules."

As soon as the Head of House turned her back on the three, Ron exclaimed, "Bugger!"

"Language, Ron!"

"Well, you look at Harry and my schedules, and see what you say! History, Double Potions with Snape, Divination and DADA? All on the first day?"

"Brutal," Harry muttered.

"Oh, please, you two...it's just as busy for me...I've got that interview while you're wasting time with the fraud...and dare I ask what you'll be doing Wednesday afternoon while I've got Runes and Arithmancy?"

"Flying, I hope," Ron said.

This response brought the conversation back around to Quidditch, and Angelina's announcement a few minutes previous that she'd been made captain of the Gryffindor squad. Rather than feign interest, Hermione got up and moved down the table to have a little chat with the Weasley Twins.

Pulling the folded advertisement from her pocket, she announced, "You know that you two aren't going to be allowed this."

Fred and George looked down at their posting and frowned.

"But how else are we going to test market our products?"

"Test market?" Hermione asked. "You two seriously thinking about starting a business?"

Fred shrugged their shoulders. "Can't see us at the Ministry all our lives...already seen what a few years of that has done to our prat of a brother."

"Not that Percy wasn't that way before he left school," said George.

"Too true, brother, too true."

"So you plan on...doing what this year?"

"Market research and new product development," Fred replied. "Though we've already been set back on that account."

"What do you mean?" Hermione asked.

"McGonagall came 'round this morning and confiscated some of our product line," George whined.

"Oh, well that's too bad."

"You sound so heartbroken, Hermione," Fred snarked. "And here we had such high hopes for our pre-emptive rewards program."

Hermione smiled, thinking of how she'd already put their Extendable Ear to good use. She then thought about Amelia Bones's statements, and how the Twins might help keep Umbridge at bay. And then her smile turned sinister as she lowered her voice.

"Look you two, I'm on your side, really...I'm just saying that you need to be a little more discreet about your testing. And maybe work on testing your products on targeted individuals who might deserve any nasty side effects that come their way."

Hermione lowered her voice even further and then said, "And I might be working in the Infirmary this year...if you did do some clinical trials, wouldn't it be better to do them when I'm there to cover for you two?"

The Weasley Twins absorbed Hermione's statement, then looked at each other with glee.

"Are you thinking what I'm..."

"Don't I usually, brother of mine?"

They turned back towards Hermione and smiled.

"We do hope…"

"That the Headmaster…"

"Didn't know what he was getting…"

"When he selected you to be Prefect."

Hermione returned the smile. "I hope that he didn't either."

**oo00OO00oo**

The morning's classes ran pretty much true to form from past years.

The History lesson on giants strained even Hermione's ability to pay attention, though her focus would have been better had she not spent so much time scolding her boys for playing hangman in the margins of Harry's parchment notes.

The much more eventful Double Potions revealed Snape in all of his disdainful glory, as he abused the Gryffindors to the delight of their Slytherin counterparts. The potion that they were tasked with brewing was really too complex for the first day...while there was no reason not to read ahead, the practical skills needed to prepare the ingredients were certainly subject to atrophy over the summer hols. Not that Hermione's version of the _Draught of Peace_ was a failure...quite the opposite, actually. But Harry had forgotten to complete one of the steps, resulting in a failed potion that his greasy-haired nemesis had vanished with glee. The Boy-Who-Lived stormed out of the room in a huff, not bothering to clean up his work station.

Once Hermione had decanted a sample of her potion into a flagon and presented it to the Potions Master, she found that there was still quite a bit remaining in her cauldron. Now, standard procedure was to cast a cleaning charm on the dregs, but given the fact that the _Draught of Peace_ was supposed to relieve stress and anxiety...and given the fact that her best friend had both in abundance...she developed an alternative means of disposal. She quietly reached over to Harry's station, nicked his unused flagon, and filled it with the remaining contents of her cauldron.

Hermione's deviance from standard procedures didn't go unnoticed. As she slipped the flagon into her bag, she looked up and noticed Pansy Parkinson staring at her.

Had it been any other year, Hermione could have counted on Pansy ratting her out to her Head of House. But given the night previous, and the new bond she shared with the female Slytherin Prefect, she decided to take a chance.

Acknowledging the fact that she'd been caught out, Hermione stared straight at Pansy and mouthed the word, "Please?"

The Slytherin witch narrowed her eyes, thought for a few moments, and gave quick glances on her side of the room to determine if she was the only one to have noticed. With that assurance in hand, Pansy returned to Hermione's gaze, gave her a barely perceptible head nod, then followed up with the mouthed words, "You owe me."

Hermione acknowledged the debt with a second nod of her head. As soon as Ron had finished clearing up his station, she shouldered her bag and pulled him by the hand out of the door.

"What's the rush, Hermione?" Ron asked.

She turned to her friend and gave what was, for her, a measured response.

"Lunch."

"Oh, yeah," said Ron, as he matched her pace. "Good point."

**oo00OO00oo**

Ron and Hermione were afraid that they'd find Harry taking out his anger and on those who either didn't deserve it or didn't cause it. They were surprised, therefore, to discover their friend leaning against the end of the Ravenclaw table, talking amicably with Cho Chang.

One look towards the Ravenclaw prefect was enough to send both Ron and Hermione's nerves on end. Ron was upset that Cho was wearing a button supporting the Tornados Quidditch team. Hermione was upset that Cho might be trying to wear Harry's robes, given how close her body was to them.

Harry's back was turned, so that Cho was the one to notice Harry's friends. She ignored Ron's indignant look, and replied to Hermione's glare with a coy smile and hand wave. Ron and Hermione watched as the Ravenclaw pointed them out, and placed a friendly hand on Harry's arm. He replicated the gesture with his hand on her opposite arm, then broke the contact and strode back towards the Gryffindor table with a small grin on his face.

"What's that all about?" Ron asked, as Harry took a seat.

"Cho just wanted to say hi, and asked about hols," Harry replied.

"That's all then?" Hermione asked.

Harry glanced back towards the Ravenclaw table, where Cho was whispering into Marietta Edgecombe's ear. "Erm, yeah...more or less...guess that she did say she thought the _Daily Prophet _was rubbish, and that she was looking forward to getting back onto the playing field with me."

Hermione internally fumed at the potential for double entendre within that seemingly innocent comment. Despite her anger (or maybe because of it?), she took Cho's side when Ron went off on the button, arguing that the Ravenclaw should be given the benefit of the doubt until Ron could prove that Cho had jumped onto the Tornado's bandwagon.

When Harry asked that his friends stop bickering, Ron shifted his verbal assaults to their Potions Instructor, in terms that ordinarily would have provoked a separate argument. But Hermione failed to take the bait when Ron blamed Dumbledore for keeping a "greasy-haired Dark Lord bootlicker" on staff.

"So, Hermione," Harry asked, "why aren't you sticking up for Dumbledore? You always have before...starting to think he's gone soft in the head, then?"

Hermione sighed. "No, Harry...I'm trying to honor your request. You did ask that Ron and I not bicker, didn't you?"

Harry chewed on his lip, and eventually decided that she had a point (or at least an excuse not to defend the Headmaster).

"Hey, speaking of trusting professors, would you look at that?" said Ron.

Harry and Hermione turned in the direction that Ron had nodded towards, and spied Professor McGonagall taking a seat at the Head Table next to Dolores Umbridge.

"Why'd she choose that seat, when there were still some at the end of the table?" Ron asked speculatively.

Neither Ron or Hermione had a good idea. That, of course, didn't keep Ron from spouting off.

"Maybe she's sucking up," he offered.

"Or maybe she's following the muggle maxim, 'Keep your friends close, and keep your enemies closer'."

"What's a maxim?" Ron asked.

"A wise saying."

"Sounds stupid to me...that'd mean that it'd be best if we ate with the slimy snakes."

"Well, the Sorting Hat did urge the four houses to work together this year..."

"Fine, you go sit on Draco's lap."

Hermione scowled at Ron, then turned to look over at the Slytherin table.

"Too late, looks like Pansy beat me to it."

Harry smiled when he confirmed Hermione's observation. He made an effort to read lips as the two Slytherin prefects talked with each other, but that effort failed when Ron forced his attention back towards the Head Table.

"Hey, have a look, McGonagall's gone and chewed on something that didn't agree with her."

Harry and Hermione watched the Transfiguration Professor's face turn white and clammy.

"Hey Fred!" came a comment from halfway down the table.

"Hey George!"

"Do you see what I'm seeing?"

"I usually do."

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking."

"As I said..."

"Look...there's the smoke from the nostrils, which would mean that it's..."

"Five"

"Four"

"Three"

"Two"

"One"

"Zed!"

The Transfiguration Professor had caught the eye of most of the Great Hall, even without the running commentary. As a result, hardly anyone missed the huge spray of projectile vomit that launched out of Professor McGonagall's mouth, and onto Umbridge's pink cardigan.

"Brilliant!"

"Taking notes, Fred?"

"Got it all down, George."

"What are you two on about?" Ron asked.

"Nothing," his brothers replied in tandem.

By now some of the students were screaming with delight. Those sitting at the staff table not covered with vomit were just as delighted, but far more disciplined at hiding their reactions. The staff also collectively decided to hide their ability to bring a _Scourgify_ spell to bear on the bits of masticated Shepherd's Pie that covered the screaming toad.

The Headmaster also appeared to suffer from some selective hearing, and ignored his DADA professor. Dumbledore instead focussed on his Transfiguration Professor, who was still retching onto the floor.

"Miss Granger?" the Headmaster called out. "Would you please come here?"

Hermione nervously rose from her chair and approached the Head Table.

"Yes, Headmaster Dumbledore?"

"I believe that you were scheduled to meet with Madame Pomfrey right after lunch?"

"Yes, sir."

"If you wouldn't mind arriving a bit early, would you be willing to escort Professor McGonagall to the Infirmary?"

"Yes, of course, Headmaster," she replied. Hermione walked around behind the table, grabbed Minerva's elbow, and slowly walked with her towards the entrance of the Great Hall. The grim expression on the Gryffindor Head's face broke only long enough to allow a wink tossed towards Gryffindor Table.

"Unbelievable," said Fred.

"Unbelievable, but brilliant" echoed George with a wide grin.

"What are you two talking about?" Ron asked.

"Our clinical trials," Fred replied.

"I don't understand," whined Ron.

"I'm not surprised."

**oo00OO00oo**

"Madame Pomfrey? Are you there?"

"A bit early, aren't you Miss...oh Merlin, what happened?"

The Hogwarts Matron mirrored Hermione's aid and rushed to support the nauseous Transfiguration Professor's other arm.

"Must have eaten something that disagreed with her," Hermione stated.

Poppy glanced down at the vomit-strewn robes and said, "Well it was nice that you brought what she ate with you."

"Should I _Scourgify_ her robes, Madame Pomfrey?" Hermione asked.

"Certainly not, girl...I'll need to run scans to see what set this off, and the soiled robes will save me a trip to the Great Hall." She then turned to Minerva and said, "Let's get you out of those robes, then."

McGonagall nodded weakly as she was led to a bed and made to sit.

"Pull the privacy curtain, would you dear?" Poppy asked Hermione. "Wouldn't do to have a sick wizard walk in and get an eyeful, would it?"

"Certainly not," Hermione replied, as she complied with the request, thinking of what Ron or Harry might say if they caught sight of the tabby cat tattoo.

"Do you know a decent silencing spell as well, dear?" the Nurse asked, as she helped Minerva out of her robes. "If you are to work here, you'll need to understand patient confidentiality requirements, especially when it comes to the treatment of staff."

"Yes, Madame Pomfrey," Hermione replied. She drew her wand and cast a strong silencing spell, taking the time to include the floor and airspace above the drawn curtains. When she turned back to the bed, she spied McGonagall, who was now dressed in a half-slip, trying to fish something out of her soiled robes.

Hermione was a little disappointed...it appeared that her Head of House was searching for her wand, so that she could reinforce the silencing spells. But then Minerva pulled a half-eaten piece of chocolate from a pocket, and tried to pop it into her mouth. Unfortunately, the confection's smell was enough to set her stomach off, and she fell into another round of dry heaves.

"Miss Granger, do you have any idea?"

"Yes, but I'd have to ask Professor McGonagall to confirm..."

"Well she's in no condition to reply, now, is she?"

"No, Ma'am."

"Well?" asked Poppy, as she held the hair of her patient away from her face.

"It may be due to a potion, or potion-laced bit of food, rather than food poisoning."

"Hmmm...worth a try," the Nurse mused. "Miss Granger, if you pull open the drawer to the table by your side, there should be a supply of bezoars within a tin container."

Hermione nodded, and retrieved one of the small shriveled objects.

"Now, I'll get her mouth open, which should allow you to pop it in..."

The young witch waited until the nurse had immobilized her patient's head with her hands, and placed the bezoar within her professor's mouth.

"Cover her mouth with her hand, while I grab my wand, please."

Hermione replied, thinking badly of herself that she was more worried about a dirty hand than Minerva's health. Meanwhile, the Nurse placed the tip of her wand against the patient's throat, and cast a spell that forced her to swallow.

"Right then, you can remove your hand, Miss Granger," Poppy replied.

Hermione complied with the request, and watched as McGonagall's breathing became less labored.

"How long will the bezoar take to work?" she asked.

"Should be seeing more an effect by now," Poppy mused.

With the immediate situation somewhat under control, Hermione remembered something, and went down onto her hands and knees.

"Miss Granger?"

"Think that she dropped it when...here we are, then," Hermione said brightly, as she picked up the bit of candy that had rolled underneath the bed. She held the half-eaten chocolate in front of Minerva and asked, "Still want to try, Professor?"

Minerva nodded, and popped the offered sweet into her mouth.

"Miss Granger, I like to think that I keep a clean Infirmary, but to offer something that's been on the floor..."

The Nurse's admonishment ebbed as she watched the color rapidly return to her patient's face.

"Morgana's milk teeth, what was that?" the Nurse demanded.

The suddenly revitalized patient turned towards Madame Pomfrey and smiled. "That, Poppy, was a necessary bit of subterfuge."

"No, okay, fine... subterfuge...but still, what was it?"

Minerva snorted as she reached back into her robe pockets for her wand. She cast a diagnostic spell towards the curtains, then cleaned her robes of the bits of pie and bile that hadn't had enough momentum to reach their intended target.

"The Weasley boys call them Puking...Puking Pasties...Pasttimes..."

"Puking Pastilles?" asked a gobsmacked Hermione.

Professor McGonagall touched her index finger to her nose, then pointed it towards her protege. "That's it...Puking Pastille."

"You just pranked the new DADA professor, didn't you?" Hermione asked in wonderment.

Minerva shrugged. "As I said, a necessary bit of subterfuge. By the way... excellent privacy charms, Hermione."

"Thank you, Profess..."

"It's Minerva, right now."

Hermione raised an eyebrow at the request. To call her professor by her first name implied that...

"Yes, Hermione," McGonagall said with a grin. "This is a Coven matter, and Poppy is one of your new Sisters."

Hermione's furrowed her eyebrows a bit, and she turned towards the Nurse. "But I didn't see you last night."

"Had a room full of patients...couldn't get away," Poppy replied with a smile. She then turned on Minerva and asked, "So what's this all about then...the nausea, and that chocolate?"

"Needed a bit of privacy to talk with Hermione," McGonagall explained. "But with Umbridge and Albus both marking me closely this morning, I needed a diversion, and a safe place to talk."

"So you used the candy that you confiscated from Fred and George?" Hermione asked with wonder.

Minerva smiled. "By any means necessary, Hermione, by any means...even if they are unpleasant. Not that I didn't enjoy spraying Umbridge's hideous jumper."

"Yes, well I imagine that they were still prototypes fashioned over the summer...I caught them trying to round up test subjects this morning."

"Will one of you please explain what you're talking about?" asked Poppy.

Minerva snorted, and replied. "The Weasley Twins have decided to develop their own line of pranking products."

"Oh Morgana help me," Poppy said, the blood draining from her face.

"Quite," said Minerva. "One of their experiments involves sweets that induce instant illnesses, with the goal of selling them to students who wish to skive out of class."

"So that bit of chocolate you were trying to swallow."

"The antidote half of the nougat," Hermione replied. "Looks like they need to play with the dosages, though...the antidote won't work if you're vomiting too violently to swallow it."

"Agreed," Minerva replied.

"So this was all a ruse, to gain a bit of time to talk behind these charmed curtains?" asked Poppy. She shook her head and sighed. "Whatever...I'm running an infirmary, here." She turned to McGonagall and said, "Were this an actual case of food poisoning, I'd have fixed you up by now...if you don't want to be missed, I'd keep your meeting short." Turning then to Hermione, she said, "Come to my office when you're done here."

And with that order, the Hogwarts Matron turned on her heel, and stepped outside of the curtains.

Minerva offered Hermione a conspiratorial smile. "I think Poppy might be angry at me."

"I agree," said Hermione. "But as to the meeting's purpose?"

"Right...it's about your prefect's badge," the Professor replied. "Did Amelia have the chance to talk about it?"

"She said that it's been charmed as a two-way communications device, but I was to ask you how it operates."

Minerva nodded. "Simply put, it employs a crude means of muggle communication...are you familiar with Morse's code, Hermione?"

The young witch nodded, not bothering to correct the misplaced possessive. "I've read about it...telegraph hasn't been used in the muggle world for ages."

"Look in the Muggle Studies section of the library, then...it will probably be written up there as the latest bit of their technology."

Hermione's mouth flew open at the comment. While it was clear that there was far more to her Transfiguration Professor than she'd imagine, she was still wrapping her mind around the concept of Minerva offering candid critiques, and treating her as a peer.

"So how is communication started?" she asked.

"Tap out the word 'start' on the center of your Prefect's Badge, using your wand tip and Morse's code," McGonagall explained. "You'll then compose your message, and punctuate it with the tapping of the word 'end'."

"And to receive a message?"

"Your message will cause Amelia's Auror badge to vibrate in brief bursts."

"Like a telephone ring?"

"You'd know better than me, Hermione," Minerva replied. "Your badge will do the same when Amelia sends a message. Three wand taps to the badge will allow the message to be relayed. If you want to respond to a message, you follow the same procedure...begin with the word 'start' and finish with the word 'end' in your reply. Any questions?"

"About the badge?" Hermione asked. "No, but I have many other questions about..."

Minerva silenced the young witch with a finger pressed against her lips. "Are they life-threatening?"

"Erm, no..."

"Then they need to wait, Miss Granger," the Professor replied, as she slipped her robes over her head. "I must get to my next lesson."

"Yes, Professor," Hermione replied, recognizing the shift in status by the use of her last name. She cancelled out her own silencing spells and drew open the privacy curtains.

"Thank you for your aid, Miss Granger," Minerva said, as she gave her head a slight jerk towards a painting on the other side of the room. "It is readily apparent that you have the makings of a fine Nurse's Aid."

"Thank you, Professor," Hermione replied, glancing at the magical portrait of a male Healer who watching the exchange with interest. "I will do my best to live up to your expectations."

"You always do, Miss Granger," Minerva replied warmly. "You always do."


End file.
